To Hoekstra is to whine using grandiose exaggerations and comparisons.
It all started with a simple, foolish tweet. On June 17th, GOP Congressman Pete Hoekstra compared the life and death struggle of Iranians trying to get their message out via Twitter to the Republican Party’s tussle with Democrats. (See quote above.) The Twitterati began satirizing Hoekstra’s tweet (see lulz below).
And that’s how the Hoekstra meme was born.
Leave us your Hoekstras in our comments.
I have to pay a $1,000 fee for my god-given right to shoot a few bald eagles from a Helicopter. Now I know how the Founding Fathers felt when they were on the run from the British and the hangman’s noose.
@petehoekstra I was just in my car and something hit me in the head. I liken it to being JFK in Dallas.
The cafeteria was out of diet coke today- now I know how heroin addicts feel.
Took a big, satisfying dump today.
Now I know exactly what it’s like to give birth.
Tied my tie too tight this morning. Must be what David Carradine felt like.
my neighbor finally tore down their ugly chain metal fence. it was just like the fall of the berlin wall.
A bad thunderstorm came by and ripped some shingles off of my house. Now I know what it was like to be on Air France Flight 447.
I actually overheard this at my office yesterday: “One of these days we’re gonna be walking down the hallway too fast and bump into each other like two metro cars!”
Oh, I thought he meant their illegal president holding the citizens at bay with fear and guns. My bad.
Pirated some music today. Now I know how the pirates in Somalia feel.
@petehoekstra: Watched Evita on DVD today. Similar to being Governor of South Carolina.
Just took a huge dump. Can’t decide if I should start calling my toilet Hiroshima or Nagasaki.
Played some paintball with a few old college buddies.
Just like Columbine.
My wife gave me a bad haircut today. Now I know how John Wayne Bobbitt felt.
Some Jehovah’s Witnesses knocked on my door today… Just like the Crusades.
meh.
@petehoekstra Today, I opened an office window to let out a bee. I felt just like Oskar Schindler.
Went hiking on the Appalachian Trail. / Now I know what Argentina is like.
I just finished filling out my census form, now I know what it felt like to be a Japanese-American sent to an internment camp. (www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individual/2009_06/018769.php)
From Chad “OchoCinco” Johnson’s twitter feed:
“Okay, first Mrs. Fawcett now Mr. Jackson, please tell me that this is a
mistaken rumor, if not this is just as sad as 9/11″
Transformers 2 made $200 million in 5 days. Now I know how the Iranians feel.
Writing an essay on British colonialism for History 101. Now I know how the founding fathers felt when they wrote the declaration of independence.
This one is actually from Cartman! He was dishing out hoekstras before it was the cool thing to do:
“I’ve lost almost ten pounds now. You see what I mean? I totally know what it’s like to be a Jew in the Holocaust now.”
http://stars.ign.com/articles/935/935712p1.html
I just beat my brother in wii tennis. Now I know what it’s like to be Roger Federer.
When I got up to get a beer, the cat stole my spot on the couch. This must be exactly what the Native Americans felt like.
Stubbed my toe this morning, now I know how lieutenant dan felt in forest gump
http://www.reddit.com/r/politics/comments/9g2×2/i_yelled_at_a_congressman_today/
^ WINNER
Winner seconded.
Welcome to the internet. Statements of absurd grandiosity will be mocked relentlessly. This is your only warning.
Jessie’s defending a Congressman’s right to say something stupid without being mocked.
Jessie’s just like Clarence Darrow in Inherit the Wind.
We will never miss the opportunity to smack a Republican when it presents itself.
NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!
Oh, bugger…